{"id":199,"date":"2017-02-03T00:02:46","date_gmt":"2017-02-03T00:02:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.hippy.com\/hip\/uncategorized\/friends-of-friends-problem-a-porno-question\/"},"modified":"2017-02-03T00:02:46","modified_gmt":"2017-02-03T00:02:46","slug":"friends-of-friends-problem-a-porno-question","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.hipplanet.com\/hip\/ask-the-old-hippie\/friends-of-friends-problem-a-porno-question\/","title":{"rendered":"Friends of Friends Problem & A Porno Question"},"content":{"rendered":"

\t\t\t\tI’m 23 and getting too old for some of the inconsiderate s*&t that my
\nfriends pull sometimes — actually, I am refering specifically to one of
\nmy extended friends. Lets call him Foul. <\/span><\/p>\n

My specific problem is that Foul is a coke-head alcoholic misogynist
\njerk, among many other things, who is extremely obnoxious and in general
\na cause of much grief. I loath to call anyone a typical anything, but he
\nis the typical Wall Street jackass that he tries to be.<\/p>\n

He is also friends with my roomate — they went to college together —
\nand will show up at alot of parties we go to or if we take a road trip.
\nAnyway, we are planning to go to an Allman Bros. concert in a few weeks
\nand then camp for a couple of days afterword, and now Foul has announced
\nhis intention to join us. I doubt that he has ever been camping before
\nand that he will be able to understand the etiquite surrounding a
\ncampsite (i.e. quiet, respect, cleanliness, etc.) The rest of my friends
\nare good about this, but can get all drunk and roudy too, especially
\nwhen egged on. I’ve tried, even somewhat forcefully, to tell him to be
\nrespectful before, but it is hard to be too insistent without offending
\nmy roomate.<\/p>\n

My question, what can I do in this situation? My roomate is a definitely
\naware of the situation but says things like — he’s a nice guy, or
\noh, he’s just wasted but screw that, man, I say you are what you do
\nwhen you do it all time!<\/p>\n

Help me, old hippy!<\/p>\n

Also, is it wrong to work in the pornography industry in your opinion?<\/p>\n


\nSounds like you have a problem. I emphasize the word YOU. You are
\nexperiencing a phase we all go through. Technically it’s called cognitive
\ndissonance. That’s when what you experience is different from that of
\nthose you respect (i.e. your roomate). The resolution to this is either to
\nalter your perceptions to match those of your roomate or come to the
\nrealization that your roomate and you are no longer on the same wavelength. <\/span><\/p>\n

Now you’re probably wondering what has all this got to do with Mr.
\nFoul. Well he is just the catalyst for change. He is the cause of the
\ncognitive dissonance that exists between you and your roomate. The
\nsolution to your problem is for you to change. Actually you’ve already
\nchanged that’s why you can’t relate to Mr. Foul. You just need to realize
\nwhat this implies. First, you have become more sensitive (or perhaps you
\nalways were, but Mr. Foul makes it obvious). Second, you and your roomate
\nhave different tastes in friends (and there’s nothing wrong with that).
\nThird, your tolerance is being put to the test. Since Mr. Foul seems to
\ninfluence your friends in ways you don’t like, you must now decide whether
\nyour friends are really who you think they are. This is another stage of
\ncognitive dissonance. The solution to this stage is to reevaluate your
\nrelationship with your friends and how that bears upon your own identity.<\/p>\n

What this all means is that you have to take a good look at yourself,
\nyour goals, what turns you on and off, and whether you are living a
\nlifestyle (including friends) that’s complementary with your self image.
\nSomething has to give in this situation. If you can’t change yourself to
\naccept these friends and their ways, then perhaps it’s time to find some
\nnew friends and new ways. At age 23, it’s a good time to leave the high
\nschool or college buddies and find people of your ilk. They’re out there.
\nIf I were you, I’d do the concert and skip the campout, making sure your
\nroomate knows your reasons (and giving him a taste of cognitive
\ndissonance!). Good Luck!<\/p>\n

As far as the porno industry goes, it would depend upon just what is being
\ndone. Porno has been with us for millenia and it’s not going away as long
\nas sex is around. Porno acts as a release valve for those millions who
\nneed it. Certain kinds of porno that exploit people (especially children)
\nagainst their will is not cool. Otherwise to each his own.<\/p>\n

– The Old Hippy<\/p>\n

Posted by: skip
\nViews: 45854
\nTopic:3\t\t<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I’m 23 and getting too old for some of the inconsiderate s*&t that my friends pull sometimes — actually, I am refering specifically to one of my extended friends. Lets call him Foul. My specific problem is that Foul is a coke-head alcoholic misogynist jerk, among many other things, who is extremely obnoxious and in […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[50,74,110],"class_list":["post-199","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-ask-the-old-hippie","tag-friends","tag-lifestyle","tag-roomates"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hipplanet.com\/hip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/199","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hipplanet.com\/hip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hipplanet.com\/hip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hipplanet.com\/hip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hipplanet.com\/hip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=199"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.hipplanet.com\/hip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/199\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hipplanet.com\/hip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=199"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hipplanet.com\/hip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=199"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hipplanet.com\/hip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=199"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}